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Author Topic: Any Good Jokes??  (Read 4665 times)

Deadneck

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Any Good Jokes??
« on: June 05, 2009, 06:15:32 PM »

Anyone have any good jokes? I am not easily offended...... these are some recent favorites.

Abortion: it brings out the kid in you.

9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape.
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Davie K

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #1 on: June 05, 2009, 09:34:42 PM »

wtf, lol
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shroomzer

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #2 on: June 06, 2009, 07:49:52 AM »

Did you know that Obama put a 40% tax on asprin?
Because they are white and they work! (no offense to anyone)
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psilocybin warrior

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2009, 11:14:58 AM »

lol i have a great one, ill have it up by tonight just cuz its alotta typing and im too lazy now.

pw
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Davie K

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #4 on: June 06, 2009, 12:45:01 PM »

have you guys ever heard the tale of sand paper sally?

A man fresh out of prision's looking for a whore house in the closest town where he was released from. he's walkin along see some guys that might know a little about theese so called.. whore houses.  they tell him down 2 blocks take a left and you cant miss it... just dont choose sand paper sally..  well he shrugs a little, "thanks" keeps walking.. 2 blocks an a wha?... asked another group of guys.. "where can find myself a nice whore house.". "oh, just hang left, you cant miss it.." they replied... finaly hes there.. walks in damn near hurting for the intisipation 2 fuck.  Guess whos the only girl around.. Sand paper sally.. ill finish this later.  :)
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psilocybin warrior

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #5 on: June 07, 2009, 11:57:51 AM »

not the one I was talkin about, but its equally good.


>Veda Stick.

PW
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Deadneck

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #6 on: June 07, 2009, 12:33:56 PM »

Quote
not the one I was talkin about, but its equally good.


>Veda Stick.

PW
Heeeey Yoooooo

Here's another one:
So a Koala Bear is really horny and wants to visit a prostitute, so he finds one and takes her to a motel and they take care of business. When the prostitute is asking for her money the Koala Bear gets up and heads for the door. The prostitute says, "Hey where are you going?" The Koala Bear says, "I'm leaving" Prostitute says, "But I'm a prostitute, look it up in the dictionary it says: Prostitute: Has sex for money, so pay up!" The Koala Bear says, "Look up Koala Bear in the dictionary. It says: Koala Bear: Eats bush and leaves."
« Last Edit: June 07, 2009, 05:00:49 PM by Deadneck »
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psilocybin warrior

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #7 on: June 07, 2009, 04:06:54 PM »

 ^_^

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Davie K

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #8 on: June 07, 2009, 06:06:37 PM »

Sand Paper sally continued~ So he's like" fuck it, lets go" hes raillin' it 2 her and notices... this is starting to burn, this just aint right.. "bitch, whats the problem here. " she replies, "oh just hold on."  she gets up and runs 2 the bathroom, comes back an lays it on em.. he thinks, "yea, thats better"  "wha'd you do sally?" she replies "Oh, i just picked the scabs an let the puss drip" 

an thats the tale of sand paper sally.

.
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Deadneck

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #9 on: June 12, 2009, 01:01:22 PM »

How do you tun a fruit into a vegetable???



AIDS
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cugak

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #10 on: June 12, 2009, 02:10:08 PM »

Why is it more hard for women to stop smoking than men?
Couse they like to draw!
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shroomzer

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #11 on: July 24, 2009, 12:03:39 PM »

What did the big mushroom say to his friends?

Stick with me, I'm a real fungi~!!!
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fattrout

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #12 on: July 24, 2009, 12:38:26 PM »

hahaha shroomzer, how do you feel today.. i just woke up, i think thats the last time i go out drinking with you and your Friends.  :ph34r:
i had to take 6 valium just to get rid of my headache..... :mellow:
« Last Edit: July 24, 2009, 01:13:27 PM by fattrout »
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fattrout

dub504

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #13 on: July 24, 2009, 01:52:50 PM »

While driving down the road the motorist saw a roadside stand which had a fortune teller sitting under an umbrella.
She was just sitting there smiling and laughing.
The motorist passed on by and went a couple of miles on down the road.
All of a sudden he spun his car around and sped back toward the fortune teller.
As he got closer to the still laughing fortune teller he began to slow down.
He pulled up next to the woman and jumped out of his car and suddenly began slapping and beating her.A policeman passing by screeched to a stop and wrestled the man to the ground.
After cuffing the man he stood him up and asked him, "What do you think you're doing?"
After a moment the man replied, ...
"Well, I've always wanted to strike a happy medium."
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Deadneck

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #14 on: July 24, 2009, 03:17:46 PM »

whomp whomp
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shroomzer

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #15 on: July 24, 2009, 11:51:37 PM »

A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs. 
Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.
The first woman said 'Have you ever had a hug?'
The man said 'No,' so she gave him a hug and walked on.
The second woman said, 'Have you ever had a kiss?'
The man said, 'No,' so she gave him a kiss and walked on.
The third woman came to him and said, 'Have you ever been f****d?'
The fellow's eyes lit up and with a big grin he said, 'No.'
She said, 'You will be when the tide comes in.'
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shroomzer

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #16 on: July 24, 2009, 11:53:03 PM »

HaHa Trout!! Wasn't me with my head in the toilet all night .... =)~
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fattrout

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #17 on: July 25, 2009, 08:34:15 AM »

haha shroomzer, i think you and my wife slip ed me a micky or something. so you gals could take advantage of me.. if you did, i don't remember a thing. :wacko:
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fattrout

dub504

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #18 on: July 25, 2009, 05:24:04 PM »

Did ya hear?
Kobe Bryant went to China.
He's holding a basketball camp for kids.
When asked what the best part about it was.
He said it was when he got to hand the ball off to the same people that make them...
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Deadneck

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Re: Any Good Jokes??
« Reply #19 on: July 25, 2009, 05:52:12 PM »

I have a solution for sweat shops...... Air Conditioning!
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